Recently while on retreat as I walked in to the Abbey Church early each morning, there was simply the sound of silence. In fact on the first morning, I had to use my cell phone as a flashlight, as it was pitch dark! But once settled in I would begin to hear the water bubbling and gurgling from the baptismal font pictured here. It was a lovely sound. A familiar sound. A calming sound.
On reflection it seems surprising to me that it took me so long to hear it. And yet… There was that darkness that I needed to negotiate. And I was on unfamiliar ground. There was an unspoken feeling of aloneness, even if that was what I was seeking. And through all of what was going on inside of me, this the font just did what it always did–24 hours and day 365 days a year. It was mine to notice, or not.
I’ve begun to consider how very much this is scenario true of the whole of our lives; and how particularly true it is of our spiritual lives. What does being “on unfamiliar ground” do to your ability to really see what is happening around you? Can you find a way to settle, or listen, or be at peace in any present darkness? Or how is it, in times that are new or changing do you hear or experience the grace of God, God’s Spirit or voice?
We all have options, we quickly realize, in darkness, or in unfamiliar territory, or when we feel particularly alone. We can react to these situations with annoyance, anger or rage (which by the way is a continuum…once we allow one, the others aren’t far behind!) So we can, as they say “curse the darkness” what ever that is currently for us. But I believe there is a better way.
In any loneliness, darkness or changing in our lives, there is always the bubbling, calming, gurgling font–the voice, grace and Presence–Who is always with us. Even when we are too distracted to notice, as I was that first morning. Even when the sounds of our own ego are screaming at high pitch. Still then, maybe especially then, the One who is closer than our breath, is waiting to be heard, waiting to be seen, waiting to give comfort, and peace.
While on retreat, it took me four mornings, to really listen as I came into the Abbey Church well before dawn. It took me three full days of observing silence and being intentional about listening…to actually hear. We are not a people who gladly get off any hobby horse(s) we are riding in our heads! But sometimes, it just takes an invitation to listen to really listen. And sometimes we have to hear the invitation over and over.
For me, the invitation during that week away came in the constancy of the font. How appropriate that the invitation to listen, the invitation to grace, to peace came by a simple awareness of the waters of baptism. For indeed what I heard was lovely. What I heard was calming and the giver of peace–and just seeing the photo above reminds me of the goodness always available every moment of every day.
So this year, I am giving thanks for the sounds and the silences that lead me to hear the grace that is splashing and bubbling and gurgling all around me. And I invite you to your own awareness of the splashing and bubbling and gurgling in your life–for the One who Is, Who was and Who is to come (like the font) is speaking 24/7/365.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING,
kathleen
Kathleen.bronagh.weller.thecelticmonk
The Celtic Monk Musings 